The Written Prayer: Day 2, Sanctuary and Light

Awakening this morning one of my favorite praise and worship songs filled my head. You probably have had similar experiences when a lyric or melody or both get stuck refusing to depart. Sometimes this is a pleasant occurrence while others are just plain annoying. Today I am happy to say was the former. The song? Sanctuary. Perhaps you know the chorus…admittedly that is all I know. There are verses, but I have no recollection of them.

Lord, Prepare me to be a Sanctuary
Pure and Holy, tried and true
With Thanksgiving I’ll be a living
Sanctuary for You.

Yesterday, I shared my thoughts on written prayers. Both praying already written prayers and also writing down my own prayers as I pray. Worry not! I do not intend to take out pen and paper while I am driving, which I find to be a prime time in my life for prayer. I am hoping to expand my prayer life with this intentional act during my quiet time with the Lord. With ‘Sanctuary’ brain streaming, a written prayer set to music, and a mighty prayer from The Book of Common Prayer, I enter into the presence of the Lord with these words, some mine, some others’

Lord God Almighty, I open the doors of my inner most being, a place that is often dark, hidden from view, a place I do not like to dwell in out of shame or fear. Nothing is hidden from you, but still I vainly attempt or stubbornly refuse to allow your Spirit access. Lord, with the song running through my head I knew you were calling me yet again to clean out yet another cubby hole of sin in me…Lord, there are so many…, so that indeed I could become a Sanctuary, a person to whom others could come and receive grace, communion, and peace. Father, let me bask in the light of your forgiveness and love, soak it up, and then squeeze it out in like measure to others. I praise you that I am ‘fearfully and wonderfully’ made, that I am accepted, and that You have a plan for my life. Let me see those very attributes in others, especially those I have the least propensity to follow through with. Sweep me clean, ‘come and scatter the darkness’, letting the light of your presence draw others to your sanctuaries and Lord, prepare me to be one. Prepare my heart now to bring to you intercessions for others. Teach me how to pray for each one by the light of your presence. Amen.

The Power of the Written Prayer in My Life

Only recently, by that I mean in the last several years have I come to appreciate prayers that have been written by others hundreds, even thousands of years before I                Ever needed them.  Perhaps it was my upbringing.  In the family of faith I grew up in, aside from the Lord’s Prayer, “Our Father”, we were encouraged to speak to God from our own hearts, not simply recite or depend on the prayers of old to guide our way.  I understand and accept this, but know now that the hymns we sing are another’s prayer. The prayers of the saints who have gone before us emerged from their hearts not some desire to have others recite them for years to come.  The Bible is filled with powerful prayers, many I now use in whole or in part when praying.  What prayer, indeed, could be more in tune with the will of God in my life or in the lives of those I pray for than the Word of God.

This discovery of written prayer as a comfort, as a help when they express exactly the needs of my heart, as a guide as to how to pray, has expanded my prayer life rather than narrowed it to an action of meer repetition of words.  Now I find myself writing prayers myself as I pray.  As I did this, I began to respond to prayer requests on Facebook with whatever tumbled out of my heart and into the post.  I did not do this without fear,  for words once written cannot be easily amended.  What if my words offended or fell short of the need?  What if?  What if?  What if?

Then it hit me.  WHO was the audience to whom I was writing?  The one who requested the prayers?  The others who would respond or read the comments?  OR, was I writing a letter to God Almighty on behalf of another?  Once I considered these questions, the realization became clearer,  first I had to get my motivation for intercession in line with God.  So, I pray, Lord, let the words of my mouth, the words I write, and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in YOUR SIGHT.

Second, I have learned writing prayers of intercession fills me with even more awe at how God is transforming my prayer life by showing me how praying in the moment a request comes through keeps me faithful.   Although,  I still respond with ‘praying’ or ‘prayers’, writing a prayer right then makes sure I follow through with my promise.

So I am thankful to the saints before me who have written their prayers for me to pray.  I am exploring the power of prayer that might come if I write more prayers down as I come to my quiet time with God.  So in keeping with that, Today I pray:

Lord, the rain is falling and I am clearly aware that we are only getting a smidgen of the rain that been dumped on South Texas this week by Hurricane Harvey.  I lift those people who have lost so much, even loved ones and pets to you.  Hold them close and bring them through this stronger than before.  For those who serve these refugees of the storm, I pray strength, courage, and provisions.  For my grandson in FTX, his squad, his platoon, the three other platoons, I pray the power of your Holy Spirit to be alive in them as they press onward to the goal before them.. Let those of us who wait to hear from them ‘light the way’ with our candles and porch lights and mostly with our prayers.  Lord, for those we know who are recovering from surgery, dealing with infection and illness, for those old folks like us who are weary today after work yesterday I pray that you would renew our strength, heal our bodies, and let us rise up to serve each other with Love.  I praise you for the rain!  I praise you for the blessing of this new day!  Forgive me my sins for they are many and I am trusting that you will.  Set me on the right path and give me the wisdom I need for this day.   Through Christ our Lord, Amen.  And Lord, please protect the momma cat and her kittens who are hiding under our shed….just asking…Amen

This beautiful prayer comes from the Episcopal Church Facebook Page…a favorite site of mine for prayers.

October: Exploring God: Free Will Redemption

Free will, the gift of the Divine, the gift of choice, the gift of voice—and yet evidence of His love, allowing each one to choose, even when we lose footing or friends, or impinge our will on God’s choice for our lives. Allowing outcomes, some tragic, often staying his hand, weeping over the choices of man, and yet God never abandons. While our acts may be random born of impatience or fear or a myriad of reasons depends often on the season of life we find ourselves in.

Sarai’s choice in Genesis, impatient, unbelieving that she could give birth, sending Hagar into Abram’s bed. To Sarai, imperfect and flawed, Hagar was nothing more than a pawn not a person, someone to blame for her own poor choice and subsequent pain.

Hagar’s pregnancy not a part of God’s plan. Still, God did not rescind or bring to an end, his gift of free will. Unlike Sarai, God saw Hagar, a woman betrayed, used, and abused. The child of her womb, unplanned, God saw him as well. God sent Hagar back, so her son would be born under Abram’s paternal banner. God knew what Sarai’s choice would mean for generations to come, but God loved them all.  He still provided the son of his promise.  God remained faithful.

When I question God’s actions or lack thereof, I remember Hagar. God could have ignored her. God could have let her die and her son, as well. God instead saw her, followed her, gave her hope. Even when later she was sent away again by the free will of man, God provided and protected this mother and son.  Even then God knew the pain for the world’s future by allowing the free will of man to stand, weaving it into his plan.

God’s involvement with human events about which I have been known to vent does not involve the media images or commentary. God moves through individuals who listen and pray. God moves through some who don’t give him the time of day. God moves without ever pulling our strings or making us walk when we’d rather have wings. . .even when he knows we are not ready to fly.  God brings us through sorrow, through the fire, through the storm to remind us of others and to offer our arms. Jesus tells me through his words, that God the Father even cares for the tiniest bird. So out of the ashes, the Phoenix rises, not from self determination but from the grace of God. Out of disaster, always at least one voice that echoes Hagar’s words, ‘God saw me, and I saw God.’  From every adversity because of free will will come a mixture of bitterness and belief.  But only the latter brings relief.

October: Exploring God: Good but Not Safe

From THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE, Chronicles of Narnia, C.S. Lewis

Empirical evidence supports that rain falls on the just and unjust, read the reports. Trust that it’s true, people of all faiths, or of none get lambasted out of the blue by disease, storms, betrayal to name just few.

While I type these lines children are mangled by war lords’ bombs and grenades, tangled bodies, a gruesome parade.  Where are you, God, who said “let the children come to me.”  Don’t You see?  The horrors of war, don’t you deplore, the sickness of what sin inflicts upon the fragility of these from unborn babies with rapid heart beat, to toddlers and teens on war torn streets?

What of us who believe, who seek to show that God is good and seek to leave imprints of God’s Provincial care. . .not a game of truth or dare?  Empirical evidence supports that Christians don’t exist in a bubble…they like every one else face trouble…so what propels them to believe in a God who is KING, but not meddling?

Once I was lost, stumbling around, now by God’s grace I have found the grandest adventure life could prepare, purpose beyond what I have or I wear, hope in the darkness, growing love for all humankind kin.  It begins with faith, but that’s not where it ends.  It begins with knowing my body and mind don’t compose who I am.

“Never tell a child,” said George Macdonald, ‘you have a soul. Teach him, you are a soul; you have a body.’ As we learn to think of things always in this order, that the body is but the temporary clothing of the soul, our views of death and the unbefittingness of customary mourning will approximate to those of Friends of earlier generations.”

Understanding of God’s allowing both triumph and pain comes in fits and starts with infant steps and gain. . .and then back again. Learning that the will of God in all human beings is that all should be saved, not safe here. Transformed internally while in this temporary cocoon to burst forth and fly eternally.

“Now may the Lord direct your hearts toward the love of God and the endurance of Christ.”  ‭2 Thessalonians‬ ‭3:5‬ ‭NET‬‬

Understanding God’s plan doesn’t change every heart of man or block the storms or still the terrorist hand.  It doesn’t make having cancer a breeze or diabetes or MS, or any devastating disease.  But if these things prompt me to pray, to offer care, to interact with God for my fellow man then more of God’s goodness and love grow in me.

October: Exploring God: Reaching

The Goal of climbing, plunging, exploring: fullness of life, not strife, not less, but MORE.   Finding strength, not pull yourself up by your bootstraps hype, instead releasing a breath and inhaling life.  Yielding oneself to receiving, good news for all who strive or those who are grieving.  Manufacturing strength can wear the strongest one out, without a doubt.  God knows.  God sees.  God holds out the gift of BOLD, FREE, FULL Life with laughter, tears, recognition of fears, glimpses of glory, the oxygen of God’s Spirit, alive in those who choose to receive and no matter how slim the thread, allow themselves to Believe and to Breathe.

 

 

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October 1, 2016 Hang on, I’ve got you, Girl

For me, these words of Jesus, set me free. Not words of a taskmaster, these. Not words of shame or ridicule or legalistic rules. Words of a lover, a helpmate, a friend. Gentle entreaties, recognition of the ravages of sin, which he conquered at the end. One who sees me beaten, tired, worn out. Who understands me when I doubt. Come, he beckons, try my way out. Watch my rhythms, move with me, place your toes upon my feet. Though the dance floor is crowded, though others snicker as we whirl about, with each burden shed, with each dip and twirl, I hear him whisper, “I’ve got you, Girl.”

Are you tired?

Worn out?

Burned out on religion?

Come to me.

Get away with me and you’ll recover your life.

I’ll show you how to take a real rest.

Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it.

Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.

I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.

Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.””
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Matthew‬ ‭11:28-30‬ ‭MSG‬‬

Just Saying….

You Are Not Making this Trust Thing Easy, God…but I am thankful You don’t give up on me.

Good Morning! Wednesday, January 20, 2016, Walden Shores, Lake Wales, FL

Watching the Today Show this morning, the news as usual, politics, terror attack in Pakistan, prisoner release from Iran, one prisoner notably missing from the release, Jamie Fox rescuing a man trapped in burning vehicle and impending snow and ice storms across the Midwest and East. In other words, business as usual in the World since we humans, the Crown Jewels of creation exercised free will.

If you are a little bit like me and mind you, I am not making any accusations here, but if you are then you have harbored at least a tiny doubt about just how trustworthy God is. I cringe when I hear unbelievers ask questions like, ‘If God is so good then why doesn’t he stop ______[fill in the blank, child killings, terrorism, destructive storms, etc.] or ‘If God is so powerful why does he allow ______[cancer, suffering, hunger, famine, racism, the mass murder of 6 million of the very people He chose to bear his name, etc.]. I cringe, because along with the seed of faith inside me there remains a tiny bit of root rot that I have been battling for years. I cringe because I don’t have answers that will satisfy their questions. I rage a little at God, having discovered some time ago that He can handle anything I sling at him. I become a bit presumptuous like Job and after my hissy fit, I feel the Holy Spirit wrap me in an embrace so powerful that it stops my trembling and comforts me, giving me hope and leading me to praise, scripture, the Body of Christ, and prayer.

One thing I know, when Eve entertained the silken words of the devil in the Garden as he whispered in her ear questioning the intentions and trustworthiness of God–God allowed it–He did not stop her. He did not stop Adam from following his wife into the same sin, which was essentially ‘wanting to be God’, the very sin that caused Lucifer’s fall. Free Will, a gift of God, comes with both blessings and curses. It is the very thing that rises up inside believer and nonbeliever alike when we think, ‘If I were God…’

For me there have been multiple moments when I would have liked to be all powerful and intervened, but one always stands out for me. I have written of this before.

Once I sat next to my daughter in a darkened ultrasound room as the technician gelled her pregnant belly and ran the magic wand over her womb, there clearly was Lydia, our first granddaughter, her form in fetal position and there was SILENCE. If I had been God in that moment, I would have reached in and restarted her heart.

But I was not, and God chose not to do that. That moment and the months afterward my relationship with God waxed and waned. I struggled, but ultimately came out stronger a woman with a mission, an advocate for all expectant mothers and fathers, for the unborn, for ordinary and high risk pregnancies.

The point here is not my ‘chosen prayer mission’, but my continuing quest to grow in faith and trust of God. It comes from acknowledging my own helplessness, to give up the idea that I just need to pull up my own bootstraps, and to let God be God. Easy??? Hardly. Natural??? Not if you are a stubborn control freak like me.

And yet, when I do, when I back off, when I pray and watch, amazing things happen in me. The pressure comes off my fragile shoulders and puts it squarely on God’s. Acceptance of whatever happens still does not come easy; however, I am able to glimpse God working in even the interruptions, the sickness, the tragedies as well as the joyful moments, in my own life, family, among my friends and in the world.

Well, God, You say You want to Comfort and Bless
That Your Nature is to Give
But sometimes in light of a world determined to stress
Not to mention my own struggles to live
Can I really trust You or the gifts in your hand?
Why, do I shrink or stiffen within
As You reach out to me, as You speak of your plan?
Your faithfulness daily always has been
So why do I find it so hard to be grateful?
Your overwhelming love, your direction, your gentle caress
When I open my self and my need, I come away full
Knowing in the moment your desire to bless.
Help me, Lord, to trust, to be less careful
To open my fists, to receive and to give you my stress
And please God, in whatever, Help me be more grateful. Amen

Not finished with me yet, because I still have a ways to go….Maybe you do, too. Just saying…

I Walked Through Hell Just For YOU

The world can be a frightening place. Life is not always fair.  Today as I completed my devotions, prayed and opened my tablet to write, these words came pouring out and so I share them with you.  If you have never known betrayal, or been falsely accused, or felt left alone to fend for yourself in an unfair situation, these words will mean nothing to you.  If, however, you like me have experienced any of these, perhaps you will find some comfort here.

Accusations
Poison Darts
Pierce my Heart
Trembling Hands, bloodshot eyes
Stomach knots, courage flies
In the Garden, on my knees
Leaving others to pray with me
God Alone in agony
While friends weary, nod and sleep
Facing the hell that man can deal
To you who read these words, surreal.

And yet, it is I
Who knows what you
When men, enemy or friend
Accuse
Are suffering Through
Hard to see how the evil of man
Could ever fit into God’s great plan
So I am here to strengthen you
Help you walk, stand and wait
Trust in Me, Don’t fear your fate.
I walked through hell just for YOU!

I will send you counselors, friends to be
At your side, but put your FAITH IN ME.
Trust Me Who conquered the grave
For My Glory My Hand will Save.
Trust me to see you through
I walked through hell just for YOU!

Getting to the Peak is a Prerequisite to ANY Mountain Top Experience

What if I challenged the commonly held opinion that “mountain top” experiences translate to the best, most exciting times of life? You know, like the birth of a child, falling in love, graduating from college, that dream job!

What if instead some of life’s high points translate to times of intense loss, trouble, suffering, or responsibility?

What if these stress generators compel us like rock climbers on a cliff to seek safe hand and footholds, to check the security of our anchor and keep moving?

Let me get something straight right here lest someone think I am saying that the loss of parent, spouse, or (and this one gives me chills) a child, or being diagnosed with cancer or any myriad of life altering tragedies should feel like a ‘mountain top’ experience. Clearly difficult times are just that: DIFFICULT yet these are the times that test and define a person’s faith and character.

What if for some the experiences that shake us up, cause us the greatest sorrow, stretch our faith, and require every ounce of our attention become in the rearview mirror of life THE MOST MEMORABLE MOMENTS OF LIFE?

I am reading THE BOYS IN THE BOAT: Nine Americans and Their Quest for Gold in the 1936 Olympics by Daniel James Brown. The author paints a story of not just the Washington University rowing program and team, but a portrait of an Era. These 9 boys were not elite Ivy Leaguers, they were sons of loggers, farmers, fishermen. Using interviews, journals, letters, Brown tells their story…especially focusing on Joe Rantz, a young man who lost his mother at age 3 only to be abandoned by his father, stepmother as they took his younger half siblings away to look for work when he was in his early teens. That he managed to survive, graduate from high school, make it onto Washington’s rowing team while supporting himself is a tribute to those who helped him along the way and his own willingness to work as hard as it took. Only one in the boat had ever rowed a lick and that was not competitively on a team.

But THE OUTCOME WAS A TRIBUTE TO THEIR HARD WORK, STRUGGLES, AND TRUSTING EACH OTHER.

SO, what if we reexamine those previously considered high points of life?

Like:

FALLING IN LOVE

MARRIAGE

BIRTH of CHILDREN

GRADUATION

DREAM JOB

GRANDCHILDREN

Honestly and I speak for myself I have experienced all of these (you probably have your own list.) NONE came without disappointment, loss, pain, suffering, and struggling to find those hand and foot holds while checking the anchor…AND while acknowledging that everyone of them involved the euphoria of accomplishment, joy, and Love.

I have also experienced grief, financial problems, added responsibilities, and health issues, mine and the health of those I love. I expect there are more of these to come, just being real here, life has a way of testing us and getting older makes those rock climbing events more difficult.

Valleys are not the hard times of life, they are the resting places, the recovery pastures, before we continue the climb. If we stay too long in the valley, we risk missing the adventures both jubilant and sad.

What if just another foothold, just another handhold brings us to another peak with a view of all the lower peaks behind us, the restful valley, and yet more higher mountains to climb.

The best part is that we are not alone. We have each other fragile as we all are. We have a God who knows our weaknesses and guides our steps. Trusting God and trusting others on the climb gives us all the grace and momentum we need to pound our fist in the air with triumph.

Grace for Broken Places

This world it is a broken place
Shattered shards devoid of grace
Centuries of human fix me ups
Yet here we are with our empty cups.

In the shadows of this broken place
Splinters of light leave their trace
No quick fixes, no bandaid cure
light that chooses to endure.

Light reflected in a child’s face
Rainbows through tears light displaced
Light within the shattered shards
That a broken world discards

Creation’s vastness, the depths of space
dots of light splash the night like crystal lace
All creation bound to be
one of three

Reflected light like moons and planets,
Bearers of light like sun and stars,
Or,

Carriers of light to each dark place
Bear cups of water share the grace
This world it is a broken place
Let us make it full  of grace
Carry healing  not just fix me ups
By His strength fill the empty cups.