Free will, the gift of the Divine, the gift of choice, the gift of voice—and yet evidence of His love, allowing each one to choose, even when we lose footing or friends, or impinge our will on God’s choice for our lives. Allowing outcomes, some tragic, often staying his hand, weeping over the choices of man, and yet God never abandons. While our acts may be random born of impatience or fear or a myriad of reasons depends often on the season of life we find ourselves in.
Sarai’s choice in Genesis, impatient, unbelieving that she could give birth, sending Hagar into Abram’s bed. To Sarai, imperfect and flawed, Hagar was nothing more than a pawn not a person, someone to blame for her own poor choice and subsequent pain.
Hagar’s pregnancy not a part of God’s plan. Still, God did not rescind or bring to an end, his gift of free will. Unlike Sarai, God saw Hagar, a woman betrayed, used, and abused. The child of her womb, unplanned, God saw him as well. God sent Hagar back, so her son would be born under Abram’s paternal banner. God knew what Sarai’s choice would mean for generations to come, but God loved them all. He still provided the son of his promise. God remained faithful.
When I question God’s actions or lack thereof, I remember Hagar. God could have ignored her. God could have let her die and her son, as well. God instead saw her, followed her, gave her hope. Even when later she was sent away again by the free will of man, God provided and protected this mother and son. Even then God knew the pain for the world’s future by allowing the free will of man to stand, weaving it into his plan.
God’s involvement with human events about which I have been known to vent does not involve the media images or commentary. God moves through individuals who listen and pray. God moves through some who don’t give him the time of day. God moves without ever pulling our strings or making us walk when we’d rather have wings. . .even when he knows we are not ready to fly. God brings us through sorrow, through the fire, through the storm to remind us of others and to offer our arms. Jesus tells me through his words, that God the Father even cares for the tiniest bird. So out of the ashes, the Phoenix rises, not from self determination but from the grace of God. Out of disaster, always at least one voice that echoes Hagar’s words, ‘God saw me, and I saw God.’ From every adversity because of free will will come a mixture of bitterness and belief. But only the latter brings relief.